In Search of Mistletoe
by pinkythesnowman
Summary: It's Christmas time, and the Prefects and Heads must go off in search of mistletoe... That bloody elusive plant. PG13 for slight swearing. [[CHAPTER 2 UP DUE TO POPULAR DEMAND 030407]]
1. Bloody Elusive Plant

In Search of Mistletoe  
PinkyTheSnowman  
A/N: Merry Christmas, everybody! Or, if you don't celebrate Christmas, happy holidays!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Ron! We're going to be late!"

"I know, I know, just let me get my damn shoes on!"

"We have five minutes before we have to get down to the Great Hall. Hermione's saving spots for us, and do you know how peeved she'll be if we're late?!"

"Yes, yes, I do know, hang on! You're rushing me!"

Harry tapped his foot impatiently in the Prefect dorm. He and Ron, being Head boy and Gryffindor Prefect (respectively) were needed in the Great Hall, and they were late. And not for the first time, either.

"RON!!"

"I'm coming, okay, let's go!"

The two boys thundered down the staircase, hoping that they wouldn't be noticed sneaking in. They snuck in to find Hermione glaring at them, Ginny seated next to her, smirking. Ron audibly gulped, and didn't move until Harry prodded him. By that time, McGonagall had noticed, and narrowed her eyes, standing up, and motioning to Professor Dumbledore that she wanted to say something.

"Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, now that you have _finally_ decided to grace us with your presence; I am forced to re-explain what had been previously discussed. Firstly, there will be a Yule Ball, to take place December 22nd. It is the job of the Prefects to work together and make this happen. You will remember that this is the 20th! Secondly, the Head Boy and Girl are to work together to think up a theme for this ball. And thirdly, because we want the most participation in our ball this year, Christmas holidays are to begin on the 23rd this year."

She sat down, beckoning them to sit down as well. Hermione scowled at them, observing Ron's messy tie, and Harry's backwards shoes. Ginny did not bother hiding her smile.

"Will you two _ever_ learn that being a Prefect or Head requires _responsibility_?"

She hissed at them. They shook their heads, earning a rather disgusted look from Hermione. But she was silenced from a reply by Professor Flitwick, who stood up on a pile of cushions to see over the top of the table..

"And lastly, Hogwarts School has run out of Mistletoe this year, and Professor Sprout and Hagrid's absence means that there is no one to grow them. We need 30 sprigs. Therefore, our Prefects and Heads will search the school grounds for them, as us Professors have better things to do."

He smiled at the group of Prefects and the two Heads. Then Snape stood up.

"Mistletoe, as you all should know by now, is traditionally used to make people,"

Here he spat out the word,

"_Kiss_. Not that I promote such things, but..."

Here Ron and Harry grinned at each other.

"Professor Dumbledore asked me to give this little speech. So, students are NOT to be purposefully kissing in the halls. The mistletoe on Hogwarts is _cursed_ with an Obligatory Spell, meaning that it will be required to kiss, and should not be abused. Kissing is _dangerous_. Do not do it sideways, on the cheek, on the lips, don't do it standing up, don't do it sitting down, just DON'T DO IT. If you do, you might catch a _disease_. And _that_, would not be pleasant."

Here he glared at Harry and Ginny, who had turned bright pink. Ron nearly stood up, but sat back down when Hermione placed a hand on his arm. They both blushed at the contact.

"Any abuse of the mistletoe will result in detention with me. You have been warned."

He sat back down, and Harry and Ron sank into silent laughter. Hearing Snape talk about kissing and mistletoe was worth Hermione's lecture for being late. Even Hermione seemed to be restraining herself from smiling.

"Your search starts... Now! Get to it!"

And so McGonagall shooed them all out into the cold, miserable gray morning, all shivering if not for the mass of cloaks and jumpers. Harry walked up to Ginny, holding his hand out, making sure Ron didn't see.

"Come on, Ginny, let's go. We need four sprigs, easy enough, and I want to leave Ron and Hermione to go look for that damn plant by themselves. Maybe they'll snog."

Ginny giggled.

"Good ideal. Let's go."

They linked arms and sauntered away before Ron could stop them. He sighed exasperatedly at Hermione.

"Now what am I going to do? I don't have anybody that will suffer with me, what with Harry and Ginny and everyone else gone."

Hermione looked hurt.

"You have _me_."

"Well, I meant somebody that doesn't argue with me constantly and nag me all the time."

"Ronald Weasley, you know I do it because I _care_ about you, and because you're my friend! I'm sorry the feeling isn't mutual!"

She turned her back on him, head in her face.

"'Mione, I'm sorry, I didn't-"

"Oh, I think you did, Ron. And you know what? I don't need a partner who doesn't need me. I'll be seeing you."

She stomped off through the snow, leaving Ron standing there, staring after her.

"What did I do...?"

A ways off, Harry and Ginny, arms full of the poisonous plant, watched in frustration.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ron stamped through the shrubs, looking for that one elusive sprig of mistletoe. He only had one left to find, and damnit, it was probably hiding from him on purpose. He looked up. Nothing. He went back to brooding about Hermione. Again.

He couldn't believe he had set her off like that again. He always turned into a prat around her. He was fine in front of other girls! Lavender was always hitting on him, and flirting outrageously, but he never felt embarrassed or stupid.

_You are a prat 'cause you love her, and you know it!  
I am not,_ he countered his brain.  
_Oh yes you are. And the sad thing is, you can't admit it._

Ron fell silent. It was true, he reasoned.

_Ha!_  
_Shut up, already. If you're going to talk to me, then tell me how I can make it up to Hermione!  
Well, you could-_

But their conversation was cut short by his running into somebody. Somebody with bushy hair, a tear-streaked face, and was rather short. Compared to him, anyway.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hermione scowled, and brushed the oncoming tears off her face, to no avail. They just wouldn't stop. She wasn't this upset at the ball, or when talking about Viktor, just this once, after Ron said that he didn't want her to be his partner. What was wrong with her?

_The problem is, you're too ugly. And smart. And naggy.  
But, that's just me!  
Well, maybe he doesn't like you! Ever considered that, smarty?  
Well... No, not really...  
You have been reading too many stupid fairy tales.  
You didn't have to tell me that Ron didn't like me!  
Too late, I did.  
Just shut up. You're not helping._

She shut off her conscience, and just concentrated on finding mistletoe. Bloody obscure plant, that was. It always showed up whenever you didn't want it to, but when you needed it, it avoided you at all costs. Ugh, she wanted to scream. Lost in her thoughts of what Ron's lips tasted like, and her resigned frustration that he hated her, she had no idea that she was walking straight into the path of one tall, red-haired boy with an expression that looked like somebody had died. So when she crashed into him, she had no idea who he was, until he caught her falling to the ground.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Ron!?"

"Hermione!?"

Looking shocked, and somewhat disgusted, Hermione yanked herself out of Ron's grip on her waist.

"What the hell are you doing?! Stalking me?"

"No, if you must know, I was looking for that damn mistletoe!"

"...Me too. How many do you need?"

"Just one! And why am I talking to you?"

"Because... You are?"  
"That is stupid, Ron_ald_. What do you want?"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hidden in the underbrush, Harry and Ginny sighed.

"This is never going to work. They're going to bicker forever, if we don't do something fast."

"I know. Got any ideas?"

"Well, we could..."

Here she whispered her idea into Harry's ear.

"Brilliant! Ready? _Wingardium Leviosa_!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------"Ronald Weasley, get your hands off of me!"

"Oh yeah."

He blushed scarlet, and quickly stepped back.

"I'm sorry Hermione, really, you know me, I always-"

Hermione, who had before looked miserable, now looked angry again. She stepped up to him, and stuck her face right up next to his, getting so close that they were nearly nose to nose.

"Ron, you do this every single time, and every single time, I forgive you! I don't even know why I bother! Why do you always do that, put me down and expect forgiveness?! I'm not just some bossy, naggy, ugly person that doesn't have feelings, you know! Why don't you understand that?!"

"I do, Hermione, I do, really, it's just that, well, I..."

"You what? You better make this good, Ronald!"

"I... Um... Love you- your... shirt?"

Hermione gave him a weird look. Ginny felt like pulling out her hair.

"You are so stupid, Ron! I really hate you sometimes! You don't even know!"

"Um... Know what?"

But when Hermione opened her mouth, undoubtedly to shout some more, she instead grabbed his face, and kissed him firmly on the mouth. Ron froze.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Ginny cackled manically, which made Harry smile. Thankfully, Hermione and Ron were too engrossed in their snogging to notice. Harry had slowly sent the mistletoe above their heads, so that they would not notice. _Good old Obligatory Spell, _he thought.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hermione finally noticed what was happening. She squirmed against Ron, but the spell wouldn't let them go, until Harry had lifted it. Feeling a bit sorry for them, he did. It just vanished.

"So, um... Hermione? What the _hell_ was that for?"

"Er, I don't know, it was probably... _HARRY_!!"

Harry, laughing, poked his head out of the bush, Ginny at his side.

"You called, Hermione?"

"What the hell was that for?"

"Hermione, don't swear!"

"Well?"

"I thought it might help you and Ron make out... I meant up!"

For Ron had glared right in his direction.

"Well, ah, Ginny and I will be leaving then... See you two at the castle!"

Harry and Ginny's heads disappeared, and running was heard. Hermione huffed at their retreating forms.

Ron sat down on a stump.

"That was brilliant, Hermione. And, I'm really truly sorry."

Hermione smiled weakly.

"Sure, Ron. I forgive you. And I'm sorry for nagging."

"It's okay. I think it's appealing when you scowl at me like that."

"_Ron_!"

"Alright, fine, I accept your apology."

"Friends?"

"Friends. Let's head back. We can say that Harry and Ginny took all the mistletoe."

"Cool."

Ron stood up, and started walking back to the castle. Hermione quickly hurried to his side, and took his hand. If Ron wasn't so embarrassed at holding hands with Hermione, he would have noticed a small smile gracing Hermione's features.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: This is one of my shorter one-shots. But oh well, it's sort of cute, isn't it? If not, then ah well. Review, please! It would really make my Christmas special. (I know the ending sucked.) I couldn't resist the Mean Girls reference, you know, where Snape is like, "Don't kiss. You'll get a _disease_." Haha.


	2. And The Chaos Continues

It's been a while! Apologies, dear fanfiction readers. While I'm here, I'll make a few notes.

Firstly, Legally Blonde: A Harry Potter Story will probably not be updated… for a long time. I'm sorry! Honest, I think about it a lot and keep trying to start up new chapters, but I cannot for the life of me understand how to continue it. If I am struck with a bolt of inspiration, it will go up.

Secondly, I was looking through the reviews on this story and many of them mentioned a desire to see more of the darned mistletoe. So I am here writing more! My writing style has arguably changed a bit, and I have no idea if I am quite as funny anymore, but we shall see.

Thanks! Love, Pinky

Disclaimer: Don't own Harry Potter

_**xoxoxox**_

Hermione and Ron made their way back to the castle in silence, having given up trying to find mistletoe on the grounds that Harry, Ginny, and the other Prefects would have plenty. Hermione was now regretting taking Ron's hand, since he clearly was not speaking to her because of it. In fact, his ears were probably burning red. She chanced a look. _Clearly red_, she noted. She sighed. She'd gone and done something stupid that not only had embarrassed her friend, it would compromise their friendship. But before these thoughts could turn to thoughts of further awkwardness, they had arrived at the castle gates. Ron broke his hand free to push open the door for Hermione, and they entered the Great Hall… only to find complete madness. Couples were kissing all over the place.

The rest of the Prefects apparently had had more than enough mistletoe to go around, because the entire Great Hall was covered in the plant, and she could see that there were sprigs lining the corridors as well. Ron swore.

"No wonder we had to search for hours! There _isn't_ any bloody mistletoe left since the entire damn population of them was pulled out by zealous Prefects!"

Hermione frowned. If she had known that there wasn't any left to find, she wouldn't have bothered trying to hard to find any. But then again, if that were the case, she would have gone back to her room, which would mean that she Ron would never have… she blushed.

"Er, Hermione? You okay? You're all red," Ron said.

"Oh! Oh no, I'm perfectly okay, it's just that…" Hermione scanned the room to find something that she could credit to having made her flush, as if the unnatural amount of kissing wasn't enough. Then she spotted something that made her jaw drop.

"It's just that over there, by the Slytherin tables, Colin Creevey and Draco Malfoy are kissing!" Hermione choked out. Ron made a noise of strangulation before whipping around only to discover that indeed, Colin and Draco were going at it. And both of them had looks of utter horror on the faces. Ron got over his disgust as quickly as it had come, and instead doubled over in hysterics. "Ron! It's not funny! _Finite Incantatem!"_ Hermione shouted, quickly canceling the effects of the Obligatory Spell and causing Colin and Draco to break apart, each looking as if they had just kissed a toad.

"CREEVEY! How dare you even come _near_ me with all the dangers around! You bloody idiot, you'll pay for this!" Draco yelled. Colin, though usually quite able in standing up for himself, nearly fainted away. Hermione rushed forward with a worried expression, catching Colin before he fell and shooing Draco away with her wand, threatening sparks. Draco edged away, eyes to the ceiling in case of any more mistletoe attacks and a heavy scowl on his handsome features.

"Colin, Colin, what happened?" Hermione prodded. Ron, meanwhile, was not helping by howling in the corner with laughter. _What an immature prat_, Hermione thought angrily. _And here Colin's nearly traumatized!_ "Come on, Colin, talk to me," Colin groaned.

"Hermione, we might need to have to lessen the power of the spell, I swear, I was walking towards Malfoy to warn him because he was about to step on his own wand, and suddenly I felt like I was being magnetically pulled towards his…" Colin apparently could not bring himself to say "lips". The Head Girl groaned. Now she'd have to go around and fix all the cursed mistletoe, and all by herself too, since the Prefect in the corner was having a fit and of clearly no use to anybody. She gently dropped Colin to the floor and started for the doors to the corridors, when she stopped dead in her tracks.

Professors Snape and Sinistra were getting quite heated in the hallway, no doubt due to a sprig of mistletoe. This was an easy inference to make, as not only was there in fact a giant sprig above their heads, but both Professors had a look of revulsion on their faces.

"Oh! Oh my goodness, excuse me, er…" Hermione squeaked. Good thing Ron didn't come with her, who knew what kind of frenzy he'd get into over this. She ran away before her eyes were scarred further. Then as she caught her breath, a giggle escaped from her lips. _Snape and Sinistra_… It was nearly too bizarre to even contemplate. Not that this particular event needed too much contemplation, any more than she'd already had might kill her.

Hermione continued to dash around the school fixing mistletoe and pulling completely random students off of each other, the least of which was not Millicent Bullstrode and Neville, looking quite Confunded and squished under Millie's great girth. By the looks of it, Neville would take a long time to recover from that one. There were Justin Finch-Fletchly and Angelina Johnson, Zacharius Smith and Luna Lovegood. Draco seemed to have gotten himself involved in another mistletoe incident, this time with an arguably more desirable kissing partner, Lavender Brown, and oh Gods above, there was Professor McGonagall bending over at the waist to reach Professor Flitwick, both teachers looking horrified. If it were not so disturbing, Hermione thought, she would have laughed. As it was, she _Finite Incantatem_ed the two apart and continued on her way, when she suddenly came upon the rare sight of Harry and Ginny heatedly fighting.

"Why did you kiss her, you prat?!" Ginny yelled. Harry cowered, but not before responding,

"Come on, Ginny, be reasonable, it wasn't exactly my fault, and she was walking by right as I put up the mistletoe, right as you'd instructed…" But at Ginny's withering glance, he shut up. Clearly, she thought that it was a voluntary action on his part that he'd kissed a different girl. Hermione approached warily.

"Hey Gin, sorry to interrupt, but I've got to un-curse some of these plants… a couple incidents have proved that these mistletoe are a bit… strong," she started. "Ron's in the Great Hall having a fit because he witnessed Colin and Draco Malfoy kissing," Hermione recounted with a shudder. Ginny and Harry had seemed to have forgotten their little fight, no doubt saved in the backs of their minds to be argued later, and were staring agape at Hermione.

"Hermione! Don't say things like that right before dinner!" Harrry yelped. "I don't think you understand how disgusting that is!"

"Harry, I _saw_ it. I think I do understand," Hermione retorted. Ginny in the meantime was plugging her ears and rocking back and forth, muttering,

"I'm not listening, I'm not listening,"

Hermione, now having seen two of the Weasleys go mad, decided it was best to distance herself from any red-haired persons. Guiltily leaving Harry to deal with a glibbering Ginny, she continued to work her magic on all the mistletoe till she'd cured them all of their compulsive kissing disorder. _Snape would be pleased_, she noted. _He never did like strong urges to kiss_.

_**xoxoxox**_

Hermione re-entered the Great Hall, discovering with relief that it was empty, save for Ron, who was thankfully no longer laughing manically. She suspected that the occasional chuckle was still bubbling up, but she could live with that. That said she approached with caution, lest Ron burst into laughter again.

"Ronald, I hope you're grateful that I've just gone around and fixed all the mistletoe brought in by the Prefects, so you don't have to do a thing," Hermione eyed him with a critical look. "How long ago did you stop laughing?"

"Laughing? At Malfoy and Colin?"

Hermione rolled her eyes. "No, the other completely awkward couple we caught kissing."

Ron looked confused for a moment as his brain attempted to process the sarcasm, but then he realized the joke. "Right. Erm, maybe half an hour ago, I'd wondered where you went."

"Oh really? Why is that?"

Ron looked sheepish, and the tips of his ears were tinged red.

"Because when you're not here I… you know?" Ron, clearly incapable of putting together a more articulate sentence, shrugged.

"No, I really don't know. Explain, Ronald."

"Er… I missed you, just a little, 'cause you weren't there when I snapped out of it."

"That makes hardly any sense, Ron." Ron continued to spit out parts of sentences until Hermione, exasperated, gave up attempting to reason with Ron.

"Well, in any case, the work is all finished up, I've seen enough disgusting things to last the rest of my life, and I am tired. So if you'll excuse me, I'll be going up to the dorms now."

Ron started. "Wait, I'll walk you up."

Nodding graciously, Hermione and Ron made the climb to the Head dorms, passing numerous students cackling with the events of that night. No doubt the news of Professor McGongall and Professor Flitwick would be all over the castle by tomorrow morning… Hermione winced. _Thank goodness I didn't do any ridiculous kissing, _Hermione thought. But she was snapped out of her reverie at their arrival in front of her and Harry's rooms. She turned to face him.

"Good night, Ron. I'll see you tomorrow, yes?"

"Yeah. Wait, Hermione, look." Ron gestured upwards, above their heads.

"What is it now, Ron? I'm tired."

"Look, mistletoe."

Hermione blushed. Ron now had a mischievous smile on his face, and was advancing towards her. Taking her face in his hands, he kissed her briefly good night, then turned on his heel without a glance back and started back towards Gryffindor Tower. A little shell-shocked, Hermione touched her lips with her fingers, then without a word swept into her own rooms.

_**xoxoxox **_

Not too far away, Professors Sinistra and Snape were standing together in a dank dungeon.

"Now, Severus, where were we?"

_**xoxoxox **_

Well, I thought that was a cute ending! Please review, I know the last part of the chapter sort of sucked but I was in a hurry to finish it, as a plot bunny has appeared in my head and I want desperately to start it. See you all soon, I hope! Love, Pinky


End file.
